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I wonder...

Am I deluding myself to think that I can simply will myself to be lower-maintenance?


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 5th, 2002 02:33 pm (UTC)
You can't will yourself, but you can catch yourself when you're being needy and try to teach yourself out of the behavoir. You can also find coping mechanisms to make it better. It won't happen over night, but it is something that you can learn, I think.
Aug. 5th, 2002 05:01 pm (UTC)
yeah... but...
nice pic :)

I wonder how compatible that is with the theory of "always talk about it, when you have a problem, when you feel bad, no matter how dumb the reason..."

Aug. 5th, 2002 05:17 pm (UTC)
Re: yeah... but...
It is when you see the same thing happening again, you've already talked about it and you know it's now your thing to work through it. Part of talking things through is figuring out what to do next time, and trying not to do it so you don't have to talk about it again.
Aug. 5th, 2002 08:23 pm (UTC)
I am not low-maintenance. I doubt I ever will be. I am lower-maintenance than I used to be, but so are most war-torn countries.

The thing is, I own my high-maintenance behavior, and I let people know it's there. My SOs know what they're getting into. And part of it is a compatibility issue - my last several SOs told me I was needy and a burden. My current one has no trouble with it, and when he does, we can talk about it.

Maybe you are high-maintenance. Or maybe you just need practice. Or maybe there are compatibility issues. But in any case, there should be compromise on both sides.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )