just a guy made of dots and lines (crs) wrote,
just a guy made of dots and lines

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New theory: I don't have enough emotional mass; it only takes a small amount of force to overcome any inertia I have. I'm working on pushing back against that, applying some negative feedback to simulate not being so flighty... But I don't think you can have it both ways; I get really happy really fast, enjoy jokes quite deeply, and movies really do a lot for me... But at the same time, a little disappointment can send me through the floor.

So is this good, or bad? I think it's good. I have the volume knob turned way up on life, I suppose. And the negatives are supposed to sting a little. It's easy to feel that way right now, though, when a very slight disappointment is just stinging a little.

Anyway, I was given an out, and I exerted some willpower, and Saturday, instead of getting to ride a train and drive a car up from Pennsylvania, I get to come in to work and be good. No hanging out with [J], but on the other hand I'll be seeing my D&D friends in the evening... Saturday is the only time this month we can all be in the same place to have a run, so they're happy I'm out, at least. So it's a mixed kind of thing to have happened.

Time to draw a secret map to all this code, figure out where X marks the spot where I can get someone else to help out on it.
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